What’s Your Inner Mean Girl Telling You?

December-11-2013 2 comments

Ok ladies, confession time.

How often do you let your inner mean girl bring out the claws and start bashing your self-worth?

Be honest.

I bet she’s amazingly talented when it comes to talking you out of:

  • Speaking up, even when you know you’ve got something of value to contribute. (Your ideas always sound better in your head anyway.)
  • Being yourself when it comes to business. You want your clients and peers to take you seriously. But more than that? You want them to like you. So yeah, fitting in seems safer than standing out.
  • Saying “no” to those extra work hours and projects you really don’t have the time or energy for. I mean, what if people thought you were copping out? Or worse, you lost out on THE opportunity because you didn’t push yourself hard enough?
  • Asking to get paid what you’re worth. You don’t want to seem greedy or selfish. (Because you’re SO not.)

Girl, you’re definitely not alone!

We’ve all been there. No matter how talented or successful we may be, we still get stuck in these momentum-freezing moments. Yes, even me—and I teach confidence for a living! (So there.)

But I hope you’ve also noticed that a lot of those self-doubts stem from worrying about what other people think.

So then what? We start living our life on everyone else’s terms instead of our own—and totally drain our happiness supply. (Self-sabotage, much?!)

The truth is: Nobody will believe in you until you believe in yourself.

This year, I’ve had the pleasure of talking to an inspiring group of women in my Activating the Confident Leader Within and Mastering your Mindset workshops about the fears that are holding them back—in work and life.

Women just like you who are successful, accomplished, and hustlin’ their tushies off in their professional lives. But they STILL get paralyzed by the voice inside their head that tells them: “You can’t do this.”

They walk through their lives feeling invisible, lost, and feeling around in the dark for their soul’s bigger purpose.

They accept more and MORE responsibility on their plates. Because they feel—wait for it…obligated. (I’m boycotting that word forever, p.s.)

But eventually, they can’t hold up the weighty expectations on that plate without letting other things drop like their coffee date with the girls or morning yoga class. So they wind up feeling like they’ve completely failed themselves—and everyone else around them.

UGH, can I just say…enough of this! You deserve so much more.

I want you to know:

  • Authenticity actually ignites collective creativity in the workplace. It’s time for you to discover your strengths and tap into your intuition, so you can start owning your glittery gifts and share them with the rest of the world—the way you were meant to.
  • You’ll feel so much freer once you claim your confidence. That means you’ve gotta get out of your own way, so you can finally act from a place of power and speak your inner truth!
  • You really need to stop waiting for that permission slip to live the life you want and just ASK for it, go after it and get it! Manifesting and visualizing what you want your life to look like will help you make it happen. (Really. I’ve seen it in action.)

And I know all of this sounds way easier than it actually is. But you know what they say – practice leads to progress (or something like that!).

So what about you?  What has your inner mean girl talked you out of? And what have you done to silence her?  Let me know in the comments below.

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  1. Janine Reply

    My inner mean girl looooooves to talk me out of establishing personal boundaries for myself. I have a tendency to take on too much sometimes–and it’s hard because I LOVE my work, so it makes it that much harder to say “no” or pass something up. It’s not always easy silencing her mentally, so I try to take action like planning “me-time” right into my calendar (just started doing this the past couple months to beat overwhelm!). When I actually write it down–workout time, walk the dog, and even “5pm–wrap up work”–it gives me a tangible, physical way to shut her up, haha.

    1. Seema Post authorReply

      That is really good Janine! As you said, if it is not scheduled, it’s not happening! Another tip is to have a few ‘whys’ for saying ‘No’ in your back pocket – er – purse! That is, WHY do you want to keep your personal boundaries? If you did, what would that open up for you? What is possible for you AND your work when you fill yourself up? It really helps when the mean girl comes out to hold onto your reason for saying no – you will notice her quiet down when you do!

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