How do I build my self-confidence? Can I really do it?  And is it possible to have consistent confidence, James Bond style?

Do you catch yourself asking these questions?  If so, there’s good news and semi-good news for you.

The semi-good news is that, every time you step outside your comfort zone, you will likely experience a lack of confidence, so ‘consistent’ confidence can be a challenge. Why? Because by definition, self-confidence is: your belief in your ability to perform a particular task. Well, if you have never done it before, how can you be confident in it?? Your level of confidence is conditional upon whether or not you have performed the task before. But remember: just because you have not performed it, doesn’t mean you can’t!

Now for the good news: YES you can build your self-confidence, much like building a muscle.

One very useful technique is managing (or silencing) your inner critic and I share how to do that here.

Here are 3 more techniques that are extremely powerful.

1. Normalize
Recognizing that you are not alone in what you are feeling is a really effective way to step out of the self-doubt place and into your self-confident place. In a world of 7 billion people, you’ve got to believe that there are others who feel what you do, even at this very moment! Read: you are normal.  Simply realizing this can help neutralize and reduce the power that those uninvited thoughts can have on your confidence level.

2. Prove it
When you are filled with self-doubt (which is a lack of self confidence), your mind brings up all the ways in which you are not good enough. To combat this, bring to mind all the ways in which you have succeeded. It can be anything from learning how to make a new dish to acing a presentation. Find proof that you are capable and confidence will ease back into your life.

3. De-personalize
Change the language you use and you will notice what an impact this has on how you are feeling. Instead of saying “I’m feeling really scared” say “There is feeling of being scared right now”. By de-personalizing the feeling, it is easier to stay immune to the impact it can have on your self-confidence. Remember: your thoughts create your emotions which impact your beliefs.

This week’s mission: Normalize, prove it and de-personalize. Practice these three techniques and make note of which one(s) work best for you! Then, write it down somewhere so that when you catch yourself feeling less than powerful, you’ve got some tools in your back pocket…or purse!

Bonus mission: Create a ‘Confidence Boosting’ playlist to listen to when you are needing that extra boost! One of my fav songs to pump me up: “I’m not Afraid” by Eminem.